Local authors remind young women they’re ‘Daughters of the King’ in new book

Therese Bussen

With so many voices competing for the attention of young people, living in the world as a Catholic millennial can be a confusing journey, especially when it comes to learning what it means to be truly masculine or feminine.

Thankfully, there are plenty of resources; but most resources for young adults and teens are produced by their parents’ generation.

This is where Colorado residents and fellow college-age women (now recently graduated) Kaylin Koslosky and Megan Finegan decided to get creative.

Their book, “Daughter of the King: Wait, Where’s My Crown?” ($12.95, paperback) is written for the modern-day young woman, from her perspective — and the result is refreshing.

Koslosky and Finegan approach a wide variety of topics with an authentic, relatable and easy to understand manner. Themes include how to have a healthy body image and love oneself; what modesty means and how to practically live it; navigating relationships and chastity; what it means to live a life of faith and encounter Jesus; their personal testimonies; and addressing what they call “buzz topics,” like relativism, the college party scene, contraception and more.

All of these topics have been approached by other writers, speakers and leaders before, but the voice of these young women, which encourages readers in everyday struggles with invigorating honesty, is a welcome take on living as an authentic and truly feminine woman.

Each of the women takes her turn sharing her experiences with the various topics. Since their personal journeys have been very different, just about any woman can find something in the book to relate to, no sugar-coating added.

The intended readers are high school and college-age women, so some women a bit farther along in these areas or who are older than the intended audience might not find it to be challenging enough; still, it’s a quick and easy read for any woman – and is full of practical advice, reflective questions and exercises to grow in virtue and in relationship with God.

The most intriguing thing about the book is that rather than it being written by an authoritative voice, it’s the peer voice speaking to other peers. These women have lived through these challenges, have come out on the other side and are still growing. It’s as if an older sister who’s “been there, done that” wrote down her experiences and passed it down to her younger sister just a few steps behind her.

And the most important message they’re passing on is the worth of the woman.

Koslosky and Finegan told Catholic News Agency, “No matter what you’ve done or where you’ve been, or what your past is or isn’t, you’re beautiful, you’re loved and you’re a daughter of the King.”

More resources for women on all of the topics covered in their book are available on their website, restoreyourcrown.com.

COMING UP: Navigating major cultural challenges

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We’re navigating through a true rock and a hard place right now: moral relativism and the oversaturation of technology. In fact, they are related. Moral relativism leaves us without a compass to discern the proper use of technology. And technological oversaturation leads to a decreased ability to think clearly about what matters most and how to achieve it.

Fortunately, we have some Odysseus-like heroes to guide our navigation. Edward Sri’s book Who Am I to Judge?: Responding to Relativism with Logic and Love (Augustine Institute, 2017) provides a practical guide for thinking through the moral life and how to communicate to others the truth in love. Christopher Blum and Joshua Hochschild take on the second challenge with their book A Mind at Peace: Reclaiming an Ordered Soul in the Age of Distraction (Sophia, 2017).

Sri’s book describes conversations that have become quite common. When discussing moral issues, we hear too often, “this is true for me,” “I feel this is right,” or “who am I to judge?” We are losing our ability both to think about and discuss moral problems in a coherent fashion. Morality has become an expression of individual and subjective feeling, rather than clear reasoning based on the truth. In fact, many, or even most, young people would say there is no clear truth when it comes to morality—the very definition of relativism.

Beyond this inability to reason clearly, Christians also face pressure to remain silent in the face of immoral action, shamed into a corner with the label of bigotry. In response to our moral crisis, Sri encourages us to learn more about our own great tradition of morality focused on virtue and happiness. He also provides excellent guidance on how to engage others in a loving conversation to help them consider that our actions relate not only to our own fulfillment, but to our relationships with others.

Sri points out that it’s hard to “win” an argument with relativists, because “relativistic tendencies are rooted in various assumptions they have absorbed from the culture an in habits of thinking and living they have formed over a lifetime” (13). Rather than “winning,” Sri advises us to accompany others through moral and spiritual growth with seven keys, described in the second half of the book. These keys help us to see others through the heart of Christ, with mercy, and to reframe discussions about morality, turning more toward love and addressing underlying wounds. Ultimately, he asks us, “will you be Jesus?” to those struggling with relativism. (155).

Blum and Hochschild’s book complements Sri’s by focusing on the virtues we need to address our cultural challenges. They point to another common concern we all face: a “crisis of attention” as our minds wander, preoccupied with social media (2). More positively, they encourage us to “be consoled” as “there are remedies” to help us “regain an ordered and peaceful mind, which thinks more clearly and attends more steadily” (ibid.). The path they point out can be found in a virtuous and ordered life guided by wisdom.

To achieve peace, we need virtues and other good habits, which create order within us. “With order, our attention is focused, directed, clear, trustworthy, and fruitful” (10). The book encourages us to rediscover fundamental realities of life, such as being attune to our senses and to aspire to higher and noble things. The authors, with the help of the saints, provide a guidebook to forming important dispositions to overcome the addiction and distraction that come with the omnipresence of media and technology.

The book’s chapters address topics such as self-awareness, steadfastness, resilience, watchfulness, creativity, purposefulness, and decisiveness.  These dispositions will create order in how we use our tools and within our inner faculties. They will help us to be more intentional in our action so that we do not succumb to passivity and distraction.  Overall, the book leads us to consider how we can rediscover simple and profound realities, such as a good conversation, periods of silence, and a rightly ordered imagination.

Both books help us to navigate our culture, equipping us to respond more intentionally to the interior and exterior challenges we face.