Face and embrace complementarity, professor Alvaré says

Understanding similarities, differences between men and women can help society, families

The word complementarity can rankle and disturb the secular world when mentioned in the context of marriage and work, yet professor Helen Alvaré said there is good reason to embrace it.

Modern secular thinking tends to find the concept of complementarity suspect, Alvaré told a crowd gathered June 1 at St. Thomas More Church in Centennial. The Church is taking a different view, sharing an increasing interest in the similarities and differences between men and women and advancing the belief that they are designed by God to complement one another for the benefit of family and society, she said.

“We’re in a situation where in the world at large, and particularly in connection with marriage, complementarity is suspect. In the Church, it seems to be assuming increasing importance,” Alvaré said.

The George Mason University law professor and co-founder of the initiative Women Speak for Themselves pointed to Pope Francis and his focus on the family.

He led a three-day Vatican conference titled “Colloquium on the Complementarity of Man and Woman” in Nov. 2014 that drew more than 30 religious leaders worldwide.

“‘Complementarity’ is a precious word, with multiple values. It can refer to various situations in which one component completes another or compensates for a lack in the other,” the pope said in addressing the conference.

He said Christians find their understanding in the First Letter of Paul to the Corinthians that says each person is endowed with different gifts and talents so as to benefit everyone.

“To reflect upon complementarity is but to ponder the dynamic harmonies which lie at the heart of all creation. This is a key word: harmony. The creator made every complementarity, so that the Holy Spirit, the author of harmony, could create this harmony,” the pope continued.

Alvaré also referred to Pope St. John Paul II’s 1995 “Letter to Women” that says complementarity is more than biology.

“Womanhood and manhood are complementary not only from the physical and psychological points of view, but also from the ontological. It is only through the duality of the ‘masculine’ and the ‘feminine’ that the ‘human’ finds full realization,” the late pope wrote.

Helen Alvaré speaks to crowd June 1 inside St. Thomas More Church in Centennial.

Helen Alvaré speaks to crowd June 1 inside St. Thomas More Church in Centennial. Photo by Jacob Machado

This realization points to man and woman’s greater purpose, Alvaré said.

“But a discussion of complementarity also brings forward … that one of the most important things about being human is being in relationship—that you were born in order to give,” she said.

She also shared Pope Francis’ address in St. Peter’s Square April 15, when he said attempting to remove these differences is the problem.

“The difference between man and woman is not for opposition, or subordination, but for communion and creation, always in the image and likeness of God,” he said. “The removal of the difference, in fact, is the problem, not the solution.”

Alvaré said historically a discussion on complementarity has led to a comparison between men and women, where one is ranked higher or better than the other.

“We live in a culture where when we say two things are different, we start ranking them,” Alvaré said. “We start saying, ‘Which one is better?’”

But it’s up to men and women to first acknowledge this pattern and misuse of the word complementarity. Alvaré said that this can be done by “providing a road map to exclude this misuse of the future. At the same time, I think a person who supports the reality and the notion of complementarity can often today, perhaps more surely than any time in the past, make a case for exploring the goods to be gained by acknowledging that there are differences between men and women and there are also qualities that overlap …”

Such an acknowledgment can lead to benefits both in the workplace and family life, she said. Instead of placing men and women’s gifts in competition with one another, she said they should be used to give to others and form relationships.

“We are built to be in relationship. That’s an essential aspect to loving God and knowing God,” she said.

COMING UP: Q&A: USCCB clarifies intent behind bishops’ Eucharist document

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Last week, the U.S. bishop concluded their annual Spring meeting, during which much about the Church in the U.S was discussed. In particular, the bishops voted to draft a document on the meaning of Eucharistic life in the Church, which was approved by an overwhelming majority.

Since then, speculation about the nature of the document has run rampant, the chief of which is that it was drafted specifically to instigate a policy aimed directly at Catholic politicians and public figures whose outward political expressions and policy enactment do not align with Church teaching.

The USCCB has issued a brief Q&A clarifying the intent of the document, and they have emphasized that “the question of whether or not to deny any individual or groups Holy Communion was not on the ballot.”

“The Eucharist is the source and summit of Christian life,” the USCCB said. “The importance of nurturing an ever
deeper understanding of the beauty and mystery of the Eucharist in our lives is not a new topic for the bishops. The document being drafted is not meant to be disciplinary in nature, nor is it targeted at any one individual or class of persons. It will include a section on the Church’s teaching on the responsibility of every Catholic, including bishops, to live in accordance with the truth, goodness and beauty of the Eucharist we celebrate.”

Below are a few commonly asked questions about last week’s meeting and the document on the Eucharist.

Why are the bishops doing this now?

For some time now, a major concern of the bishops has been the declining belief and understanding of the Eucharist among the Catholic faithful. This was a deep enough concern that the theme of the bishops’ strategic plan for 2021-2024 is Created Anew by the Body and Blood of Christ: Source of Our Healing and Hope. This important document on the Eucharist will serve as a foundation for the multi-year Eucharistic Revival Project, a major national effort to reignite Eucharistic faith in our country. It was clear from the intensity and passion expressed in the individual interventions made by the bishops during last week’s meeting that each bishop deeply loves the Eucharist.

Did the bishops vote to ban politicians from receiving Holy Communion?

No, this was not up for vote or debate. The bishops made no decision about barring anyone from receiving Holy Communion. Each Catholic — regardless of whether they hold public office or not — is called to continual conversion, and the U.S. bishops have repeatedly emphasized the obligation of all Catholics to support human life and dignity and other fundamental principles of Catholic moral and social teaching.

Are the bishops going to issue a national policy on withholding Communion from politicians?

No. There will be no national policy on withholding Communion from politicians. The intent is to present a clear understanding of the Church’s teachings to bring heightened awareness among the faithful of how the Eucharist can transform our lives and bring us closer to our creator and the life he wants for us.

Did the Vatican tell the bishops not to move forward on drafting the document?

No. The Holy See did encourage the bishops to engage in dialogue and broad consultation. Last week’s meeting was the first part of that process. It is important to note that collaboration and consultation among the bishops will be key in the drafting of this document.


Featured photo by Eric Mok on Unsplash