Demystifying Autism: A Catholic Parent’s Guide to Understanding and Embracing Neurodiversity

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By Christina Bordeaux, PsyD

Licensed Psychologist, St. Raphael Counseling

Parenthood is full of joy, excitement and, let’s be honest, a few nerve-wracking moments. When it comes to our children, we all want to do what’s best for them.

But if you’ve found yourself wondering whether your child might be on the autism spectrum, you’re not alone.

The good news? There’s a lot of misinformation floating around about autism.

The bad news? This misinformation can make you nervous about seeking answers and support.

As Catholic parents, we’re called to love our children unconditionally, and that includes embracing their unique qualities, whether they fit the “traditional” mold or not.

So, during this Autism Awareness Month, let’s take a look at some of the most common myths about autism and debunk them in a way that’s informative so you can feel empowered to make the best decisions for your child.

Myth 1: Autism is Caused by Bad Parenting

It’s the classic myth that won’t quit: “If your child has autism, you must be doing something wrong.”

Not only is this myth totally untrue, it’s also harmful. Autism is a neurodevelopmental condition with roots in genetics (and likely a few other factors), but it’s not caused by anything a parent does or doesn’t do. Autism is just something individuals are born with and boils down to differences in the brain, both structurally and functionally. So no, you didn’t cause it by implementing vaccines, letting your child indulge in sugary snacks or not providing enough play dates.

We believe that every child is a gift from God, made in his image. Parenting is a journey, and we’re all learning as we go. Seeking help for your child’s development shows love and care, not failure. So, let’s throw out the idea of “bad parenting” and focus on being supportive and loving parents.

Myth 2: A Diagnosis Will Label Your Child and Limit Their Future

Some parents hesitate to get their child tested for autism because they fear the diagnosis will be a label they can’t shake. They worry that this label will limit their child for the rest of their lives.

Here’s the thing: a diagnosis is not a sentence. Rather, it’s a road map to understanding and support. Knowing that your child is on the autism spectrum simply helps you figure out what support they need to thrive.

The Church teaches us that every person is valuable, regardless of their challenges. Autism doesn’t define your child. Your child’s heart, character and potential are what matter most. The diagnosis? It’s just a helpful tool to give your child the best start in life.

Myth 3: You’ll Know If Your Child Has Autism — It’s Always Obvious

Some people think that autism is easy to spot. If your child has autism, they should be showing clear signs, right?

But autism is a spectrum, meaning it looks different for every child. Some kids show clear signs from a young age, while others may not show any obvious signs until they’re older. It’s important to remember that autism is not a “one-size-fits-all” condition, although most children will show some differences in their social skills, communication ability and emotional regulation. 

So, don’t wait for a big flashing sign to tell you something is up. If you’re noticing developmental concerns — whether it’s speech delays, difficulty with social interactions, becoming dysregulated by changes in routine or something else — it’s a good idea to talk to a professional. Early intervention can work wonders, and getting the right support as soon as possible helps your child thrive in the long run.

Myth 4: Children with Autism Can’t Lead Fulfilling Lives

If you’ve heard this one, we get it — it’s scary. The myth is that kids with autism won’t be able to lead happy, successful lives.

Spoiler alert: this is totally untrue. Sure, every child with autism may face different challenges, but with the right support, love and opportunities, children with autism can achieve great things. Many grow up to excel in careers, build meaningful relationships and live happy and independent lives.

The Church reminds us that every person is created in God’s image and has a unique vocation and purpose. Your child may have a different path, but that path can still be filled with success, joy and love. Autism doesn’t set limits. It just means we need to get creative in how we help your child unlock their full potential.

Myth 5: Autism Can Be "Cured" with the Right Treatment

While there’s no “cure” for autism (because it’s not a disease), many therapies and interventions can help children on the autism spectrum live their best lives. These treatments can help children develop vital communication, social and life skills to be more successful. But instead of thinking of autism as something to “fix,” it’s helpful to see it as part of who your child is and acknowledge that they just have a different way of interacting with the world.

As Catholic parents, we’re called to embrace neurodiversity. Your child is wonderfully made by God, and helping them navigate the world with the right support doesn’t mean changing who they are. It means giving them the tools to thrive and feel more successful when interacting with their neurotypical peers and the world around them. Remember, your child is exactly as God created them.

And what a boring world we would live in if everyone were the same!

Love and Support, Above All

If you’re a Catholic parent wondering whether your child might have autism, first take a deep breath. Remind yourself that you don’t have to have all the answers right now. What you can do, however, is embrace the diagnostic journey with love, patience, curiosity and a willingness to learn and seek support when needed.

Autism doesn’t define your child — it’s just part of their beautiful, unique personality. By seeking answers and support, you’re giving your child the best chance to succeed, be happy and lead a fulfilling life. The Church calls us to love and support all people, no matter their differences or the challenges they face. So, let’s step away from the myths, embrace our children as they are, and trust that God has a special plan for each of us.

If you’re considering autism testing, remember it’s not about labeling — it’s about understanding and supporting your child. Let’s love and support our children fully, celebrating all their wonderful quirks along the way!

There is Help Available.

If you and your family are facing any of these issues, St. Raphael Counseling can help. The largest Catholic therapy practice in the country, we provide evaluations for learning difficulties, attention problems and autism in a timely, thoughtful way that supports children and their families. We also offer a wide range of services across the Archdiocese of Denver, including individual therapy, school counseling, couples counseling and family therapy. With flexible scheduling, insurance options and a sliding scale, St. Raphael Counseling makes care accessible.

A ministry of Catholic Charities of Denver, our team provides therapy and counseling in alignment with the teachings of the Catholic Church. Call 720-377-1359 or visit straphaelcounseling.com today.